What Is ABDL? Common Age Play Questions Answered by DaddaG

Who is DaddaG?

DaddaG is a long-time member of the ABDL (Adult Baby/Diaper Lover) community, a devoted caregiver, and the organiser behind KangaCon—Australia’s first age play convention. With over 20 years of experience, he’s become a beloved figure in the community, known for his nurturing presence, strong ethics, and deep passion for helping others feel safe, seen, and accepted.

In this week’s episode of Turns Out I’m Into It, DaddaG joins Harley Rabbit to answer some of the most common questions people have about age play—especially those who are just beginning to explore this side of themselves. You can listen to the full episode on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, or listen on my website. 

What is age play, really? Is it just pretending to be a child?

Contrary to how it may look on the surface, age play isn’t about pretending. Age play is about accessing a deeply authentic part of yourself that reflects how you once felt as a child. This part of you may be linked to strong emotional and sensory memories, such as the feeling of wearing a diaper, sucking a pacifier, or being cradled and cared for.

Age play often involves a gentle mental regression—where the adult mind melts away, allowing someone to embody their younger self, free from the pressures and self-consciousness of adult life. In this way, age play can be incredibly freeing, playful, creative, and even healing.

During our interview, DaddaG describes this part of someone as their “core.” He talks about seeing the “little” inside many adults—even those who don’t consciously engage in age play. He explains that we all get cranky when we’re tired. We all want to be held. Age play simply gives people permission to go there, to express those needs openly, and to feel cared for in a way we don’t usually get to experience as grown ups.

“What you’re seeing is the core. A lot of adults I meet—men and women—I see that little within them… the little things they do. And I think, oh my gosh, you’re a little kid!”
— DaddaG

What’s the difference between an AB and a DL? Or are they the same thing?

An AB (Adult Baby) enjoys the nurturing and regressive aspects of age play, like being fed, cuddled, or read a bedtime story. Some AB’s also enjoy an aspect of humiliation. A DL (Diaper Lover) is more focused on the sensory and emotional experience of wearing diapers or nappies, which can be comforting or erotic. For DL’s, wearing diapers this does not necessarily include regression.

Some people identify strongly with one role, while others (like DaddaG) move between them depending on the context.

“I’m a DL at core, I’m very much a DL… But there’s also a case that if I slip a onesie on, okay, and I cuddle a teddy, that’s when the three-year-old kid in me comes out…”
— DaddaG

What is the binge/purge cycle—and how can age players manage it?

Many age players go through a phase where they’re excited to explore, buying all the gear and diving in—only to be overcome by shame and throw it all away. This is often called the binge/purge cycle, and it’s especially common early on.

DaddaG recommends storing things out of sight instead of purging. If you can, talk to someone in the community about keeping your things at their place for a while. This way you can take a break if you need to, but not have to start all over again if you decide you want to keep exploring.

“My garage used to be full of people’s bits and pieces because they bought it and I said, just don’t throw it out, just come get it when you’re ready.”
— DaddaG

How can you store ABDL items discreetly?

Discreet storage is something many age players worry about—especially when living with housemates, family, or a partner who may not know. DaddaG recommends practical solutions like plastic crates, opaque tubs, or suitcases.

It’s easy to feel like our ABDL gear is radiating energy just by existing—but as DaddaG gently reminds us, most people won’t notice a closed box or a tucked-away container. What feels emotionally loaded to us is often invisible to others.

“Black plastic crates with lids are a great way to do it, because it’s private, it’s not clear. You can store it in the garage or in a bedroom and no one’s gonna be none the wiser… Sometimes get an old blanket, put the blanket over the stuff, and no one’s gonna look.”
— DaddaG

How do you tell a loved one about your ABDL desires?

Coming out to a partner can be one of the most vulnerable steps in exploring age play—and sadly, not everyone responds positively, especially at first. For many people, ABDL brings up fear or misunderstanding. It’s often confused with things it isn’t, and that initial shock can make it hard for loved ones to take in what you’re really saying.

That’s why DaddaG encourages those who want to come out to a partner, to go slowly. Don’t expect full acceptance right away. Instead, give them space to process and ask questions. It can help to explain what ABDL truly means to you—whether it’s about comfort, connection, intimacy, or identity. Focusing on sharing the feelings you get from it, can help people understand what it means to you, rather than focusing on stereotypes.

It is important not to ask someone to participate in your kink (not straight away at least). Start by simply asking them to understand it is a part of you. For more advice on sharing your kinks with a partner, check out my post “How to Tell Your Partner What You’re Really Into.”

On the podcast, DaddaG shares a beautiful story of a man who kept his desires hidden for years before finally opening up to his wife. To his surprise, she didn’t just accept him—she leaned into the dynamic and found joy in caregiving. It became something that deepened their connection.

“If your partner loves you, and they’re open-minded, they’ll accept that it’s part of who you are.”
— DaddaG

Conclusion

Age play can be one of the most misunderstood areas of kink, but at its heart, it’s about tenderness, safety, and the courage to be seen. Whether you’re a caregiver, a little, a curious partner, or someone still figuring it all out, you’re not alone, and there is definitely nothing wrong with you!

As DaddaG reminds us, there’s a little inside all of us. And when we create space for that part to be expressed, without shame or judgment, we open the door to becoming our true selves. 

🎧 Want to hear the full conversation?

Listen to the full episode of Turns Out I’m Into It wherever you get your podcasts—on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or right here on my website. You’ll hear even more personal stories, as well as get the inside scoop on the future of KangaCon.

DaddaG has kindly offered our readers and listeners to reach out to him with any questions. You can find him @daddagra on instagram, and @DaddaG on Fetlife.

If you would like support around your ABDL kinks, this is something I offer in my coaching. For more information on how I could support you, click here.

Till next time—play safe, have fun, and stay curious!
Harley 🐰 xox